Mocha, Take the Wheel

So, I went to Starbucks this morning. It's my Dancing Goats alternative when I'm Chatta-working. I think I've got the formula down to make the Starbucks version of my signature iced mocha less heinous...only 2 pumps of chocolate vs. the 4 that they normally put in there. I ordered coffee, not a candy bar, people. Anyways, my Chatta-barista tells me that I have been chosen for an online survey and that participation in said survey enters me for a chance to win $1,000. Woot!

Of course, that's the first thing I do when I get to the Chatta-office. Here's the rub...if I'm honest and tell them their coffee tastes like crap and I only get it because there's no Chatta-ternative, I ain't winning no $1,000. It's just like the Publisher's Clearning House sweepstakes. No purchase necessary my ass. You're not getting that $1,000,000 unless you are up to your armpits in Field & Stream and Better Homes & Gardens.

So, as much of a betrayal as it is to my beloved DG...I have to admit that I kissed a little Starbucks ass to get a shot at the $1,000.

I feel so dirty.

I did draw the line however when asked to rate on a scale from strongly agree to strongly disagree whether or not I found my visit to Starbucks "uplifting." (I kid you not.) It's coffee, people, not Opra....er, I mean Jesus.